My publisher has accepted my new book. I wasn’t sure they would take this type of nonfiction; a memoir dedicated to my partner of 31 years who fought a courageous unflinching battle with brain cancer. The next step in publication is waiting for the cover art and book block to be sent so I may read and proof them. I anticipate the book release early in the New Year.
Losing Ron catapulted me into deep grief and I was barely able to function. However, I was continually helped by an incredible counsellor. I have never been a weak person, always able to stand on my own. Grief took me to a place I’ve never been. As a result of the counseling, and all I have learned, I have written this memoir of my experiences, written in such a way as to help others who experience profound grief and all the emotional devastation it brings.
When I first tried to write anything to keep my mind focused somehow, what poured out was poetry. I haven’t written much poetry in the past, but now it just comes to me if I sit with the intention of writing such pieces. A beta reader of the manuscript has said my early poetry is raw and desolate, then moves into stages of understanding and healing. Overall, he said the book touched something deep in him and he will never forget it.
My small memoir contains both heartfelt poetry and instructive essays that provide meaning and understanding of the bereavement process, meant to help others through their grief. By learning how others handled their grief was I able to understand my own. My hope is that my memoir helps others the same way.
A Poem From the Book
A Wounded Bird
I watched you
near lifeless, unmoving
barely breathing
My heart wrenched
as I fluttered around your bed
like a wounded bird
not wanting to dump
my jumble of emotions
onto you
I wanted to hug you
hold you
but I didn’t
for fear
of interrupting your peace
It is one of my
biggest failings
I should have held you
picked up your shoulders
held your body close to mine
You may have felt me too
one last time
Not doing so
one of the biggest mistakes
of a wounded bird
Lessons Learned
What I’ve learned is that grief never ends. It simply meshes into our life experience. Grief will never die, as long as we love our departed.
For those of you who wish a deeper understanding of grief and bereavement and how to get on with your life; for those who need to learn how to treat others experiencing grief, I hope you will purchase my book when I announce it published.
I will be donating a portion of the net proceeds of the first year’s royalties to the American Cancer Society – Renal Research.
Last Note: After Ron read the book The Black Swan, by Nassim Nicholas Taleb, and found he totally understood it’s tenets, Ron became known in his circle of friends as The Black Swan. A black swan played an important role in our lives and is explained in my memoir.